He wanted me to draw him (top left) and Piper (the dog). Then he drew me (the one in the middle with the giant head on legs), Daddy (the one on the far right), and Roman (at the bottom).
Step back and be amazed at the talent.
Brock is learning how to draw pictures of actual things these days, and I kind of love it. I like seeing how his little brain puts the shapes and objects together on the paper (or chalkboard) and then hearing how he describes what the picture is. He drew a square house with me inside it one day and another day drew each family member laying in their beds. These are just fun little developmental skills that I like observing, and when he drew this picture with me today, I wanted to document it so I could remember. He wanted me to draw him (top left) and Piper (the dog). Then he drew me (the one in the middle with the giant head on legs), Daddy (the one on the far right), and Roman (at the bottom). Step back and be amazed at the talent. *This post is part of a 31 day series called Real Life. If this is your first stop along the way, I am so glad you’re here! All of the blog posts in this series will be linked together on the intro/Day 1 page if you are interested in reading more. Click here to be taken to Day One. Thanks for reading!
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Can we talk for a minute about one of my pet peeves? I promise not to go all soap-boxy (or, I promise to try not to), but I want to address something that makes me a little crazy. Personal Responsibility Well, actually, the lack of personal responsibility is what makes me crazy. Whether we're talking about obesity or poverty or gun violence or even just a car accident, when people won't own up to their contribution to the problem in any given situation, it really gets under my skin. Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that everything in life can be blamed on a person's choices or actions. I know sometimes we get dealt an unfair hand, and every step forward results in two steps back. And even when someone is in a bad situation because of their own choices, I still think we should be compassionate and generous. But there is a large percentage of the population (based on the random sampling of people I have observed throughout life) who seem to constantly live out a victim mentality. Everything that is wrong in their life is the result of other people's decisions or the influence of some external thing they had no control over. Like the person who sues McDonald's because their coffee is too hot or because they are overweight. I just can't figure it out because when I burn my tongue on a cup of coffee, you know who I blame? Myself! When I have a car accident because I wasn't paying attention to the fact that I didn't have a green arrow and should've yielded to the oncoming traffic, you know who I blame? Myself! (That's a true story). Sure it would be nice to pass off that responsibility because then it means that I'm not culpable for my actions and can't be punished or held accountable for anything, but there is this little voice inside me that seems to say, "Hey, you were wrong. Even if it makes you look like a moron, you need to take responsibility for it. That's the right thing to do." Some people don't seem to have that little voice though, and today my son was one of them. Here's what went down. It was almost rest time, and he was watching Netflix on my iPad. Normally, I make him rest in his bed for about 45 minutes without any books or tv shows or whatever. He never sleeps anymore, but I still like him to get that downtime. Today, however, I was feeling generous, so I told him he could go ahead and keep watching the iPad, but he had to lay in his bed. As he laid down, he asked me to go get his yellow and white cars out of the living room so they could rest with him. I glanced around the room and didn't see them, so I told him we would find them after rest time, but I wasn't going to go digging through all the toys to find them right now. His response wasn't, "Ok, that's cool Mom. Thanks for checking. I'll just be grateful for this awesome iPad you're letting me continue to watch." No, his response was (in the whiniest voice he could muster), "But I wannnnnnn'tttt the yellow and white carrrssss." So I talk to him about how he's being ungrateful and even offer him a few cars that are lying in his floor (that he was happy to play with yesterday), and then I tell him that he can either lay there with the iPad and the cars I gave him or he can keep whining and being ugly about the cars he wants and lose everything. Well, I'll give you one guess what he chose. (Anyone having flashbacks to my Ungrateful Heart post... clearly the Thankful Leaves didn't completely cure the problem.) But here's what really got me. In the midst of a small tantrum, after his daddy had to step in and spank him for the way he was speaking and acting, he verbally lashes out at me and angrily says, "I'm acting this way because you took the iPad away from me, Mommy!" Woah, wait. Excuse me? So, my dear sweet son, you're telling me that you are pitching a fit, crying, and acting like a hateful little child all because I took the iPad away from you? Let's rewind back to the part where I gave you a choice, the part where I said you could choose the good option or the bad option. Remember that? Remember when you had two clear choices laid out on the table for you by your patient, loving, and merciful mother, and you chose the one that resulted in you losing the good things you weren't thankful for in the first place? That, my child, is what is happening here... you are experiencing the undesirable consequences of the bad choice you made, and you are trying to blame that on me. But we discussed this together, and it seemed to click in his head that it was his own actions that led him to this unpleasant situation, and then it was like the angry fog cleared and his heart immediately softened. I asked if he wanted to pray to God to help him make good choices and have a happy and thankful heart, and he did. And his little attitude did a complete 180. So the moral of the story? Yes, there are sometimes bad implications and liabilities that come with accepting personal responsibility, but I think there is also a sense of freedom and a healthy level of control to be found when we acknowledge that we often have the option to choose, the ability to make decisions that lead to good or bad consequences. I'll take personal responsibility over helpless victimization any day. *This post is part of a 31 day series called Real Life. If this is your first stop along the way, I am so glad you’re here! All of the blog posts in this series will be linked together on the intro/Day 1 page if you are interested in reading more. Click here to be taken to Day One. Thanks for reading!
I had an interesting little conversation with my 3.5 year old yesterday. It went something like this: Me: "Brock, we have some friends coming over for dinner tonight, and they have a little girl you can play with!" Definitely going to have to think through this topic some more before the next time the conversation comes up. Hopefully, it will be another 4 or 5 years before he gets curious about it again. In the meantime, thank goodness for distractions and short attention spans! *This post is part of a 31 day series called Real Life. If this is your first stop along the way, I am so glad you’re here! All of the blog posts in this series will be linked together on the intro/Day 1 page if you are interested in reading more. Click here to be taken to Day One. Thanks for reading!
Two thoughts when I saw this today: 1. Yep, I'm pretty sure I've done every single one of these things. 2. Thank goodness I'm clearly not the only one! *This post is part of a 31 day series called Real Life. If this is your first stop along the way, I am so glad you’re here! All of the blog posts in this series will be linked together on the intro/Day 1 page if you are interested in reading more. Click here to be taken to Day One. Thanks for reading!
Tonight I'm thankful for my husband's big, happy, loving family. I'm so lucky to have married into a family where the two sisters-in-law I gained became two of my closest friends. To have a mother-in-law who would give you every possession, every ounce of energy, and every bit of herself that you need. To have brothers-in-law who crack me up and who feel more like real older brothers to me. To have a house full of kids running around, laughing together, fighting, learning from each other, loving. I love that my two sons have 6 cousins to entertain themselves with, and I really love the quiet conversations it affords us parents as they're all off playing with one another. I'm thankful for this family. I am really so blessed to have each of them in my life! *This post is part of a 31 day series called Real Life. If this is your first stop along the way, I am so glad you’re here! All of the blog posts in this series will be linked together on the intro/Day 1 page if you are interested in reading more. Click here to be taken to Day One. Thanks for reading! This little guy brought me his daddy's shirt out of the laundry hamper today and insisted I put it on him (meaning he wouldn't leave me alone until I figured out that's what he wanted). So I stuck him inside that oversized shirt and grabbed my phone to take a picture. I don't know why he wanted to waddle around in his daddy's clothes, tripping over it and losing his arms inside of it. But I'd like to think it's because he wants to be just like that great daddy of his. Things like this melt my heart and make me look forward to seeing my boys grow up to be like their father in so many ways. They have some great footsteps to follow. *This post is part of a 31 day series called Real Life. If this is your first stop along the way, I am so glad you’re here! All of the blog posts in this series will be linked together on the intro/Day 1 page if you are interested in reading more. Click here to be taken to Day One. Thanks for reading! The picture above is something I'm really thankful for. The one on the left is me almost two months after Roman was born. I started out overweight with my second pregnancy because I had never really lost the pounds I put on after I had Brock, so when I was pregnant with Roman, I hit the 200 pound mark, which is the heaviest I have ever been. After he was born and I lost the pounds that immediately go away with childbirth, my weight settled at about 180. I felt tired and miserable (not just because I had a newborn), and I was really motivated to get healthy again. For my height (5'3"), a healthy weight is between 117 and 140 pounds, so I set out with a plan to get there. I thought I'd share here the three things that helped me accomplish my goal in case anyone else would like a little inspiration or motivation. 1. Weight Watchers and Meal Planning I've done the Weight Watchers plan a couple of times before, and it's always been a successful program for me. You don't have to buy certain foods or cut out certain categories (like carbs or fats). It's about portion control and making better choices, so you kind of train your body to make good decisions and eat well. Weight Watchers gives you a specific number of points you can eat each day (based on your current weight, age, activity level, gender, etc), and each food has a points calculation based on the amount of fat, carbs, fiber, and protein it has. You also get 49 flex points each week for those moments of weakness or special occasions, and you can earn more points by exercising. It all sounds extremely complicated, but if you have a smart phone or tablet, the online program they offer really makes it so simple. You download the app and track your foods throughout the day, then record your weight at the end of each week. So, for example, I currently get 26 points a day. As I add the foods to my app, it tracks how many points I've eaten and how many I have left. Then any time I exercise, I earn points that I can add to my weekly balance. Fruits and most vegetables are zero points, so there's a built-in incentive to eat more of those and less of the higher point items (like cake, fast food, etc). The other aspect of keeping track of what you're eating is that you can plan ahead for the day and know what you should or shouldn't have. This has been a huge part of what helped me do well, planning what I will eat for dinner each day so that I know how much I can afford to eat at lunch. If I know I'm going to have a heavier dinner or that we'll be eating out, I plan for a lighter lunch and extra fruit and vegetable snacks to keep me full. With the Weight Watchers plan, it's possible to eat out, to have the occasional cake and ice cream, to indulge every now and then but still lose weight in a healthy way. Ultimate Food Value Diary is another similar option if you want to try the WW plan but not commit to the monthly WW fees (although I find the monthly fee keeps me a little motivated to stick with it). *Side note: Weight Watchers also has a plan for women who are breastfeeding so that you can diet while nursing without worrying about losing your supply. This is how I was able to start the plan so soon after having a baby. 2. Accountability If you choose the Weight Watchers Meeting option, accountability is kind of already built in to the plan because you go to a group once a week to weigh in and talk with others who are also on the weight-loss journey. I chose the online plan and did well with it for about 5 months until my motivation started to wear off and the holidays rolled around. I had lost around 25 pounds and was back down to about 150 (my starting weight before I got pregnant with Roman), so I started feeling complacent and less enthusiastic. Then a friend from church approached me about wanting to join Weight Watchers herself and asked if we could be accountability partners. We decided to share our food journals with each other at the end of each day (so someone else would see the good and bad choices we were making) and then share our losses/gains at the end of each week on weigh-in day. A few weeks later, we added a third friend to the group, so we all work to hold each other accountable and encourage or sharpen each other when it's needed. This has been a key factor for me because if I am only doing it for myself, it's easy to start getting lazy and not care as much. But if I know there are other people who are on the same path and who will see what I'm doing and call me out on it if I start to slip, then I'm much more motivated to keep going and do well. It is a risky thing asking someone for help and opening up to them about your struggles, but I'm very thankful for my accountability girls. 3. Jesus This one is a little tricky because I'm very hesitant to put God and losing weight in the same sentence, like He is some kind of health coach or magic genie who I just consult for whatever personal needs I have. But at some point along the way, I came to the realization that food was an idol for me. If I was stressed, bored, tired, happy (pretty much any of your basic emotions), I would turn to food. I started realizing that I use food to comfort myself and to satisfy me in ways that it shouldn't be used. I was taking my need for God out of the equation and replacing it with a need for food. So when something stressful was happening, instead of turning to my Savior for help and wisdom, I would find myself retreating with something sweet and fattening because it made me feel better. This is nothing short of idolatry. Once these things occurred to me, I started asking God for help to fight my reliance and dependence on food because, if I'm being really honest, it is just as wrong for me to be a slave to food as it would be for me to commit adultery. So it became a matter of pursuing holiness and not just a pursuit for better health or physical appearance. So those are the three major things that helped me accomplish my goal of weight loss. I'm down to 125 pounds and have lost 50 pounds on Weight Watchers in just a little more than a year. It takes commitment, it takes perseverance, and it takes sacrifice, but it's worth all the effort when you succeed! And I think it's important to note that the three things I mentioned are all relevant to other areas of life too. So regardless of what you are wanting to accomplish, in order to do well and be successful: You need a plan/goal, you need accountability, and you need Jesus (not necessarily in that order). *This post is part of a 31 day series called Real Life. If this is your first stop along the way, I am so glad you’re here! All of the blog posts in this series will be linked together on the intro/Day 1 page if you are interested in reading more. Click here to be taken to Day One. Thanks for reading!
I don't have much to give with this post because I've struggled with a cold coming on all day. The boys are in bed a little early, and I just want to lie down and snack on some goldfish crackers and fall asleep watching tv. One thing I will say though is how thankful I am for neighbors and the relationships I am developing with them. One of my neighbors (who I consider a friend now) just texted me to make sure I knew about the bad weather coming in (which I did not). Another neighbor helped Blaine cut down some brush in our yard last weekend. Brought over his chainsaw and insisted on helping, after he had already done a significant amount of work on his side of the fence. Another neighbor keeps us informed on important things happening in our community and with other families on our street (like when there was a death recently). And still another offered us their grandchildren's swingset that has been outgrown. I'm starting to see, as we develop these friendships and slowly grow more acquainted with the people living around us, I'm starting to see the value of community, of being connected to people. I like knowing the names of the individuals living next door, and I want to be more intentional about knowing more than just names, but knowing their needs, how they can be helped, their relationship with God, how we can pray for them. I'm hopeful that these relationships with our neighbors will only continue to grow and that God will use me for His glory right here on this little street in this little town in north Georgia. I'm looking forward to what He has planned, as I respond in obedience to His mission right here in my neighborhood. *This post is part of a 31 day series called Real Life. If this is your first stop along the way, I am so glad you’re here! All of the blog posts in this series will be linked together on the intro/Day 1 page if you are interested in reading more. Click here to be taken to Day One. Thanks for reading! This song and its message are all I really have today. That no matter our circumstances, no matter the pain or difficulty or trouble we are experiencing, no matter the hardness or distance of our heart, God is constant and always good and completely sovereign. In mymeh day yesterday. In my joyful, carefree days. In my really tragic, really awful days. God has not and will not leave me or forsake me for a single moment of any of those days. And there is my peace, there is my comfort, there is my strength, there is my joy. The abiding, unfailing, constant provision and affection of God. Joshua 1:9 *This post is part of a 31 day series called Real Life. If this is your first stop along the way, I am so glad you’re here! All of the blog posts in this series will be linked together on the intro/Day 1 page if you are interested in reading more. Click here to be taken to Day One. Thanks for reading!
You ever have one of those days? You know, where it's not really a bad one or a good one, just kind of meh. Like that's the only word you can think of to describe it. Today was meh. Even being a Saturday couldn't really make today wonderful like all the greatness of last Saturday. For starters, the lovely pumpkins we/I carved last Saturday are apparently rotten now, so when I walked outside to throw away a dirty diaper, I had to pass through swarms of gnats coming out of the jack-o-lanterns' orifices. So those went in the trash with the dirty diaper. Guess they were fun for a week. This is pretty much what the living room has looked like all day and probably what it will continue to look like until tomorrow when hopefully I'll have the desire and motivation to get everyone to help me clean it up. Every time I look at it, I'm just like, "Meh." Granted, it could be (and has been) a lot worse, so I should probably be thankful, but then again the day isn't over yet. Also of note, is the fact that I haven't even bothered to put pants on my child today. It's 5:30 pm, and he hasn't worn anything other than that t-shirt and his underwear all day. Meh. At least his teeth were brushed before noon (which, sadly, is more than I can say for myself). This is what I had for dinner. A cheese sandwich and green beans (and two donut holes, not pictured because I may have eaten them first). And the library books that were due today (including the broken one I wrote about a couple of days ago)... well, I pulled up to the library doors at the precise moment they were locking them to close up. Literally. I got out of my car to take the books in, and the librarian locked eyes with me as she turned the latch on the doors. Which is fine; I probably should have done it this morning instead of waiting so late in the day. In my defense though, I did leave the house early enough to get there on time, but: Not that I have anything against paying respect that way. It's the right thing to do. It's just, come on, right at that very moment? When I'm trying to get my library books returned before they close?! Once again, thank you Murphy's Law. Anyway, I don't mean to complain or whine. Like I said before, it wasn't a bad day really. And there were actually some very good things about it. Blaine got a huge amount of yard work done that I've been wanting him to do for a long time. Since I didn't care about cleaning anything today, I was able to do some reading at nap time. And even though Brock was feverish again all last night, he was mostly in a good mood today, and I even caught this moment where he was sharing his Tic Tacs (and probably his germs) with Roman (who actually did get some clothes put on him before noon). So that was my meh day. Now, I hope I've made you feel much better about yours. :) *This post is part of a 31 day series called Real Life. If this is your first stop along the way, I am so glad you’re here! All of the blog posts in this series will be linked together on the intro/Day 1 page if you are interested in reading more. Click here to be taken to Day One. Thanks for reading!
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About Shelby
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